Call me NiceGuy.
I'm 27. I like to think of myself as a decent human being. (I buy drinks for my friends when we go out, I give people presents that they didn't even ask for. I treat animals kindly. I'd really like to SHOW you all that I really AM a nice guy! If I could hop-through the computer, into your house- I'd go and make you a big bowl of popcorn right now, as disturbing as that sounds.) Long story short, I'm the kind of guy who women say they want but choose to ignore.
I'm working in the city of Michinoshi, Japan (as of April 2002). Here, I'm pursuing my career, brushing-up on my Japanese and basically experiencing life in a foreign country. That, and I left the U.S. because I was more than a little sick and tired of dealing with the nutty women back home for reasons that I'll discuss at length around my site...
While I try to put humor into my writings, what I write isn't supposed to be strictly for fun. Indeed, I try to discuss some very real and important issues that impact on the lives of many people, both women and men. Some of the things I say aren't pleasant, but they should be said nonetheless- mainly because not enough women consider the male side of the argument as they go-about their daily lives. I'll state it here flat-out: a huge number of women in the U.S. are casually bigoted towards males because they find it to be somehow empowering. Worse yet- they have trouble recognizing their ugly behavior for what it is. The things I say shouldn't just be shrugged-off as 'female-bashing' and ignored; I actually have a larger purpose in mind. Not only am I telling the story of my life, I'm also trying to provide a critical frame of reference to allow my readers to ask fundamental questions about female behavior. About things such as how their behavior eludes accountability, about the problems that their behavior creates for males... and finally, how female behavior seems to reward bastard males while pushing-around decent males without ever giving a damn about them.
I'm fairly well educated (got an advanced degree from one of the world's highest-rated universities) and I speak a couple languages fairly proficiently. I'm a white guy who is in fairly good shape, with brown hair and blue eyes. Until being laid-off in the U.S. last year, I had a good job, and I made a very decent amount of money. What's more, I once RESPECTED American women very much. I want to treat women in general as equal partners, and I think women are just great. Yet, women still suck- oh, but none quite so much as the American kind. I was nice as HELL to them. I gave and I gave and I gave... yet I couldn't get a girlfriend. I couldn't get a woman to get romantically interested in me. I was great as FRIENDS, but never anything more. American women just didn't like NiceGuy in "that way"... Hope of finding love was one of the great human aspirations that kept me going- however, any hope of finding it in America withered as I slowly became more aware of the heinous, shrieking gorgons I was actually facing in that country. Familiarity only caused me to recoil in horror.
I don't like having to tolerate prejudiced women
More about me: women back home often asked me to fix their computers, prepare their taxes, help move their furniture. They needed me to help them with their programming classes, with their history papers, with their homework. They asked me to pick them up when they've missed the bus, they asked me to loan them money when they're in a jam, they asked me to bring snacks in the middle of the night. And since I'm a NiceGuy, I did it all. "Oh, you're such a good FRIEND!" They smiled at me as they exploited me... and I never got a girlfriend. When I asked if they'd like to go out somewhere, they were always careful to throw-in the fraudulent qualifiers: "You're like a brother to me.", "I just want to be friends.", "I don't think of you in THAT WAY." "When you find a girlfriend, NiceGuy, she's going to be so lucky... But it won't be me because I only get turned-on by guys who treat me like shit."
Romantically, I was invisible- all because I was Nice. I was a real jackass for being NiceGuy. Going out of your way to be nice to an American woman seems dumb. You know what? I have enough goddamn female friends. Why the hell should any guy like me treat any woman decently- ever? You always end-up feeling cheated in the end and passed-over as a love interest!
Millions of men around the U.S. are nice guys like me. They make an effort to think of women as equals.
They are attentive, faithful, kind and nurturing. While some people call us "nice
guys", others (primarily women) call us "just friends," or even
"wimps." We hear things like: "you are such an angel." "You
are so sweet." "You are so understanding." "You say the nicest
things." "You are so considerate." "I love the flowers."
"You treat me better than all my old boyfriends." "We have so
much in common." "I know I can rely on you when I want to whine to somebody
about the guys I do sleep with." And that, friends, is when
you fight the urge to hit her repeatedly upside the head with a broken bottle!
They are being given an opportunity to date a man who will not treat them
like shit, yet they flatly refuse to! If they want their lives to
be that way, then I say they deserve nothing less!
Most nice guys have done more than their fair share in the great campaign for equality, yet women insist on vilifying them and demanding yet more. What's your reward for treating women decently? Datelessness, being ignored, being exploited, being lied-to and generally being considered unattractive. (Guys? Ask yourself the following question: what was the last time a woman you went-out with on a date would ever actually spend her money on you?) All the while, we absorb all the sexist man-bashing that women think is just so hilarious to dish-out. What the hell kind of system is this supposed to be? This isn't fair, and soon more nice guys might learn the apparent errors of being nice, and turn... hmm, shall we say - not so nice?
Guys like me were conditioned to believe that if we always tried to do our best, we
could be accepted for who we are and get a bit of lovin' too. But that's a myth.
A fraud. A big damn lie. American culture is one which is so heavily skewed, it
sees love and romance almost strictly in terms of what the female wants. What
the female expects. What the female demands. What the female has the ability to
veto. Stuff the male, he is fodder. He is the one who needs to do all the work.
He is the one who needs to change. The woman should just be herself, no matter
how horrible or deceitful or shitty she turns-out to be.
During my experiences as a student in Taiwan, I was exposed to women who didn't seem to approach romantic relationships in that way. They seemed to approach relationships as something more than just 'my needs, my wants, me me me'. They actually seemed to think that the male matters half a damn. They actually seemed willing to make a small effort to please me. That is why I got the fool idea in my head to leave my home country behind for a while...
Today I've unfortunately reached the unpleasant conclusion that it'll take me, a self-proclaimed nice guy in-exile, to lucidly and succinctly give examples to the American women back home of exactly why they suck. (Unfortunately, too many of them are already deaf to reason and blind to facts, but I still hope I might be able to lead at least one of them to a clue.) Examples such as their bigoted and sexist personalities, for starters. Or the fact that even the most smugly self-assuredly 'intelligent' women in the U.S. will claim that they're 'oppressed' while conveniently ignoring that they will, on average, outlive their male counterparts by at least six years. (Out-living your oppressors is a mighty curious form of oppression, isn't it?) Or how about when they dress to show-off their bodies, but act indignant when a man has the nerve to actually look? Or how about their claims that women are just as tough, capable and savvy as men to compete in the rigors of the workplace- but they also expect us to believe they need special protection from dirty jokes in the workplace! (Laugh!) I often find it hard to take the poor, deluded dears seriously! They just don't get how insane they are! You'll see lots more concrete examples of their gender-bigotry, dishonestly, duplicity, grasping avarice, self-centeredness, cruelty, accountability-dodging, hypocrisy and outright lunacy as you read-on. And that's just for starters.
And once you leave the U.S., you start to observe that a significant percentage of the planet chuckles with scorn, seeing female Americans for what they are... A mass of over-privileged, churlish, wacko, fem-supremacist dweebs. And that's in the countries where people actually like Americans.
Am I really supposed to be attracted to these... these... blinkered, over-priced, sneering Medusae?
Ahh, American females... so totally untainted by flaws... (Laugh!)
It was so wonderful of them to allow me to breathe the same air as they...
They sure as hell can't seem to figure it out for themselves, can they? They walk-around totally oblivious to the things that are horribly wrong with themselves and are devoid of the judgment to know any better. ('Self improvement'? What's that?) Worse yet, they are totally convinced that any of their flaws or problems must be the fault of men or 'society' and never themselves as individuals! Someone has to give the poor darlings back home some advice to shape-up. They're so hopelessly clueless yet so smugly convinced of their own superior insight that they're blinded to the possibility of their own imperfection! They have got to be the most crassly unreflective humans on the planet and they seem to be determined to stay as ignorant as possible. American women would be laughably pathetic if they didn't spread so much social harm as a by-product...
Special message to the American 'ladies': This might sound mean, but the harsh reality is that if it wasn't for the possibility of having sex with you, half of all men wouldn't even bother talking to you much less put-up with all the crap that you dish-out. What, you really think men endure your shit because you're such a brilliant conversationalist and awesome companion? (Laugh!) Remember when your parents told you that you were so wonderful and so precious? Well, they lied. Sorry. The sad truth is: most of the time you're a prejudiced absurdity in mascara- and totally oblivious to it.
Oh sure, you might have a diploma, a nice job... and maybe you've even been told that you've got a decent brain in your head. Good for you. But despite all that, you still possess the thinking and attitudes of an overindulged 5-year old. Gee, seeing as how I'm just a poor, dumb male and I think with my penis instead of using both sides of my brain, I guess I'm not qualified to point-out what a bottomless-pit of a self-obsessed, catty bitch you don't realize you actually are?
The next time you joke about how useless and incompetent men are, here is something that will never dawn on you, babe: the only reason you can even speak so ignorantly is because 'useless' men have created and built, through invention and back-breaking labor, the means for you to live so comfortably. This is what grants you the ability to think about something other than day-to-day survival, as you will never deign to dirty your hands with chopping your own firewood, fetching your own potable water or building your own house. No matter how 'independent' you fancy yourself to be, if men stopped doing all this work for you, you'd perish within days. So you are free to do things like color your toenails, sob at the soaps, look all pertied-up, gab with your friends over margaritas and all of the assorted self-centered garbage that you useless, mollycoddled, painted American sluts do all day long. The truth is you are an utterly mindless parasite who'd rather scream "GIRL POWER" than get half a clue.
You should pray that more people won't eventually catch-on to what a purposeless, unthinking dollop of steaming excrement you are.
Don't ever think that a man needs you that badly, hon...
It's not that I totally dismiss the existence of good women... but I think there must be so few of them in the U.S., their numbers have got to be down near the level of statistical error... 'plus or minus one percent'.
More about NiceGuy: he tried to make the women back home women happy. He entered the dating game wanting to be the opposite of what women hate: the male jackasses who use and abuse. The ones who lie and cheat and steal and hit. NiceGuy wanted nothing more than to open-up his loving heart and have a girlfriend- his one, true, special woman whom he can shower with affection and hugs. The one woman to whom he can share good times and his feelings with. He just wanted ONE woman to whom he can be faithful and show how much he cares. But... yet he never got a girlfriend. What a jackass he was... I mean, even Hitler had a girlfriend! But now, he'll give it a try in a different country...
Here's the real meat of my gripe: I have a hundred female friends back in the U.S. They're all reasonably intelligent people. They all describe me as a real NiceGuy. So what? Well, then they would go-out and hump the first jobless, uneducated, brainless, dirty, lying male pig-dog that crossed their path.They would strictly date the scum who were only after 'one thing'... precisely the kinds of men that these same women said they DIDN'T want! (Wha?!?) But after an emotional roller-coaster in which they got lied-to and used, a few months later they would call me up at night all tearful: "OH he dumped me! He's such a jerk! Why can't I ever meet a Nice Guy... like YOU??" That's when NiceGuy would turn into: (dun-da-da-DUN!) Captain FreeTherapist! *HUZZAH!*
"Oh, Captain FreeTherapist, thank you for letting me sob to you all night about my boyfriend who slaps me around, alienates me from my friends and steals my money! I know I can always whine to you because I'm a bottomless pit which needs to suck-in all the sympathy anyone can give!"
Yes, Captain FreeTherapist! Providing free therapy for all kinds of heart-broken women. He's supportive, kind, loving, caring, sharing... and on-call for YOU! He'll bring-over Cookies-N-Cream for you at 1 AM so you can whine and wail about the latest asshole-of-the-month who just dumped you for someone more attractive! Your beloved Mister Asshole might ruin your life and smack the crap out of you, but you can always complain to Captain FreeTherapist about it! However, lately Cpt FT is all sympathied-out as far as American women are concerned. He just doesn't give a damn about them anymore... they can all go slash their wrists, leap-off the tops of buildings or guzzle poison en masse for all he cares. It's not their whining I mind so much (though it is pretty bad), but it's their bone-headed, blind hypocrisy that infuriates me and every other nice guy out there. (Ahh yes... by the way, Captain FreeTherapist could never land a girlfriend either. What a jackass he was.)
But now I'm here in Japan. I'm running a Grand
Experiment. I'm trying to determine if nice guys can get the
girl in the end. I can't tell you how difficult it was to reach this point: to
act on the idea that if I wanted to meet a non-bitchy female, I had to abandon
North America. What can I say? I lived among American women. I got to know American
women. And because of that, I just don't want an American woman. Consider
emigration to be the ultimate form of rejecting.
I invite you to read my writings and ask yourself: am I one of those geeks-turned-psychos, or am I just a rational, logical, semi-intelligent, decent human being who woke-up and realized that he was living in an asylum full of the most disdainful and pestilential females on the planet? You be the judge. Read. .
"Not all men are fools -- some are bachelors." -- Unknown
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