To Roger: May he Rest In Peace.

Let me tell you a story about a close friend of mine. Let's call him Roger. I knew him for about 8 years, and in that time, he showed me just how wonderful a human being can be. He was a NiceGuy. He was as nice as *I* want to be one day!

Roger wasn't the best-looking guy in the world. Like me, he looked kinda geeky. He was taller than average and heavier than average (I was the opposite). He wore glasses and didn't have great fashion sense, but you know what? It didn't matter. I've never known anyone else who came close to matching his inner beauty. He was fun to be with. In terms of the quality of his character, he was second to none. I'm proud to say that that I was lucky enough to have my life enriched by him.

He was a very smart guy- 2 bachelor degrees and he was in medical school. Great sense of humor. Knew a thousand songs by heart. Excellent at debating. Was always a very level-headed, reasonable person, never rushed to judge people. I never heard anyone say anything bad about him. He had a lot of friends, and he was among the small core group of people I called my "Best" friends. The content of his character went beyond simply him being fun to be with- he did things that really showed the kind of guy he was. He gave to charity. He volunteered his time. He took-in stray animals. Very few people can match him in terms of the size of his heart. I am convinced that he owned at least 10% of humanity's total decency.

However, he had bad luck with the ladies. I don't think he ever had a real girlfriend for more than a month or two, and it wasn't for lack of trying. He had female friends that he liked, and they always made it clear that he was just a "Friend". He was just a NiceGuy, and women didn't want to be more than friends with him. I think that was a source of frustration for him. Fewer things are more painful than unrequited love. Here he was, this smart, tender, loving guy... He didn't lose his virginity until he was 21 (late, compared to quite a few guys), and it saddened him that he had trouble getting dates. Well, I can't quantify how much it bothered him, but it was a palpable source of frustration for him. I understood exactly how he felt. We'd talked about how upsetting it is to pursue a woman that you like and she just turns around and tells you that she just wants to be FRIENDS because you're a NiceGuy. Blech!

Anyways, about 3 years ago, things in his life started getting complicated. He had a lot of pressures being piled on him (medical school, family issues, etc.). Emotionally, he started buckling under the strain, getting in arguments with his parents more and more often. Then, one night, he got into a really serious argument with his dad. To make a long story short, a gun 'accidentally' went-off and Roger died.

I got the news by e-mail, and I couldn't make the funeral because I was out of the country at the time. It was very sad (yeah, us guys CAN express emotions from time to time.) My circle of best friends got a little smaller, and I felt a little lonelier.

A few nights after, I had a dream... I was in a restaurant of some sort... and Roger walks-in.

"Roger!" I smiled. "I thought you were- dead."

Roger nodded and smiled back. "You know, it's a great way to avoid taxes!"

We sat-down at a table... I remember the table had a bowl of fresh fruit sitting on it. We started talking, I don't really remember what we talked about. But at the end of the short dream, he turned to me and suddenly looked very sad. Opening his mouth, he looked me right in the eye and said "You know, the ladies never cared for me much, did they?"

I woke up.

That started me thinking... no, the ladies really didn't. To this day, I can NOT figure-out why. Roger was EVERYTHING that a decent human SHOULD be. He had so much going for him. Why the hell wouldn't women date him? What the hell was wrong with him? There wasn't anything wrong with him. It was the damned curse of the NiceGuys.

I started to think... would his life have turned-out different if he had a girlfriend? It was certainly possible. It would've been one less source of angst for him, after all. He might've been a happier person during a tough time in his life. If he'd been with his girlfriend that fateful night, perhaps he wouldn't have gotten into that fight?

Then I got mad.

It just wasn't fair. IT WASN'T FUCKING FAIR that he should be deprived of female affection. Of all people, he deserved far, FAR better.

Then I got really, REALLY FUCKING MAD.

I PERSONALLY KNOW TOTAL MALE-BASTARDS who get more pussy than they can COUNT. But oh, not Roger- no, he has to get his damn FACE BLOWN-OFF!!!

This irrevocably proved two points to me: 1. Women wouldn't recognize a quality man if he bit her on her ASS and 2. There is NO God! There is NO FUCKING JUSTICE!!

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"Men will be nice when nice guys get laid." -- Unknown.

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P.S. Wow, I teared writing this one.