Women's Magazines

Ever look at a woman's magazine? Sometimes I do it, because it's like gathering intelligence on "the other side". I want to understand what women think, what women say about men, how they think, what they look for... I'd honestly like to be a better guy.

I challenge you to go to a newsstand and leaf-through a copy of Cosmopolitan, RedBook or Marie Claire. The article titles are not encouraging if you want to believe that women aren't shallow. These are ACTUAL article titles that I've seen:

"How to land a wealthy, powerful man." "Why millionaires pay $10,000 to meet you." (This one was really shallow, because it wasn't only about very wealthy men who pay a large amount of money to meet women through a certain California dating service. It's was also about how these guys are totally clueless when it comes to dressing right or acting right. So, these guys pay thousands of dollars for female consultants to tell them how to look good for women and how to act more attractive. As if they don't have non-monetary qualities to compensate for lack of good clothing, they also have to re-adapt their behavior.) "How to Lie and Get Away With it." "How to get everything you want (in bed)". How to get what you want... get what you want... get what you want... Oh, and there are also at least 40 THOUSAND articles about how guys need to improve in bed.

Over and over, every month, it's just the same repackaged crap. A thousand variations on the same theme. I'm positive they change the word 'man' to 'guy' and 'sex' to 'romp in bed' and re-run the same article again six months later.

And the men at these magazines who write 'Inside scoop' or 'confession' articles about stuff from a man's point of view... they're not like me at all. They kind of seem... well, kind of rotten. If I ever met any of them in real life, I probably wouldn't feel too comfortable hanging around them. They're totally dick-happy and act like they get far more sex than I do.

Elitism, Sexism, Fluff

Some years ago, I saw an article called "What women really want" in Cosmopolitan. I xeroxed it because it pissed me off so much. The cartoon illustration beside the title showed a French-poodle sitting on a couch with a cocktail glass, while a more masculine-looking dog wears an apron and vacuums the carpet.

It was an "open letter to men", (that idea is horse-crap, because the readership of Cosmopolitan is almost all female). This article was meant exclusively for female consumption. It started-out "With the possible exception of playing games involving balls of all types, the major pastime for men is to complain about how baffled they are by women..." Uhh... not an encouraging start. It was organized into a list of about 40 or so bullet-points.

Basically, the article was about how women want cunnilingus, the ability to basically control everything within a relationship, the privilege to override every male decision, and plenty of wining, dining and gifties. My personal favorite point: "Women take orders from their mother: Mother Nature, that is. Sometimes, we just won't make sense. But try to keep-up anyway."

I was quite disgusted. The article was patently unfair and blatantly sexist. In short, it was stereotypically female. There was nothing about women having to give anything to men. Do women really think this way? Sadly, enough women read these magazines to make them quite well-established. I understand Cosmo gets published in multiple countries, in multiple languages.

In the summer of 1998, I ran-into the fashion editor of a major woman's magazine. I won't name which one, but the magazine has a monthly readership in the millions (including my sister at one point in her life). I met the woman by chance, as I was passing through Los Angeles Airport. We were waiting for a flight, and I struck-up a conversation with her. She was attractive, well-dressed and... hyper-perky. She gave me her card, even.

I try to really get to know a person before I make judgments. But first impressions mean a lot, and my first impression of her wasn't favorable. I think she was a ditz. She was a blonde, overpaid ditz. In fact, a month later, I happened to see her being interviewed on a CNN fashion news bit for about 13 seconds, commenting on head-scarves. Head-scarves! How much can there possibly be to know about head-scarves, for crying out loud?

Is she typical of the women who make these magazines? I just don't know.

If I spot a copy of one of these rags in my future girlfriend's possession, I'll seriously consider dumping her. It's not worth the head-games that these magazines endorse.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"As a sex, we are vastly superior to men, but it is taboo to show it." -- Kate Saunders, prominent English feminist, Sunday Times, (UK) 16 July 1995.

Back to Home